Saturday, February 9, 2008

Findsomeone.com

I thought I'd enrol for Findsomeone.com. I filled out the most random hapharzard listing. I gave a false listing. I was looking for my ex brother in law. To find him but not for any romantic reasons. I wanted to see how he described himself. Kind of a futile exercise really. And I can't really justify why I did it. Just that I happened to be on facebook - I typed his name in and there he was adn cross linked to findsomeone.co. Randomly and sperately, it was probably triggered by the work I am looking at at present - which is about who will care for you when you are sick, infirmed, old etc.

Well, my first "smile" was from a man with a snake around his neck. My second encounter was from a man who describes himself as "great package". A few others in between have siad we seem to have a lot in common. Where the heck they get that idea from is beyond comprehension from what I wrote on the profile.

This exercise has made me a little depressed. As in if I was doing this seriously what would I write: hate housework, don't read much, don't see the movies much, don't go scubadving, live like a hermit.

This brings me to the fact that I think I am a little depressed. I slept a lot again this weekend. Perhaps I am worried about my job. I don't know. I do feel a little overwhelmed that a lot of my colleagues have Phds. Why I get overwhelemed by this I don't know. Its not as if I haven't worked with intelligent people and actually do yo need a phd in some random topic to work in policy?. I really don't like ambiguity and talking in the clouds. But I'm elected to place myself in a workplace where I have to cope with this and master it. Now I have to make it work, but its taking effort.

I'm going to put in a plan of action re my depression. eg reduce sleeping, reduce alcohol, eat more protein and energy food and exercise more, and think posititvely ect - but heck it takes effort. If only it could all be magically transformed during my sleep periods.

I cut my hedge to the council standard. I guess now in another year it will be how I wanted to look this time.

Crikey,as I type this, my negighbour (westside) has parked their car in their garage in and out at least 3 times. Odd. This reminds me being Chinese New Year, I pruchased bamboo. To plant and grow. It was revenge on my westside neighbour for cutting my beuatiful tree down.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

excellent re findsomeone but fill out a proper profile already. not that i can talk really, but still.

also, i'm being superexceptionally introverted at the moment too. i think i blame the weather. but i doubt it is caused by anything as tangible as that.

and also you're undoubtedly a ray of sunshine at yr new work, phd or not.

Kitsunegirl said...

I am also a member of the exceptionally introverted club right now. Lots of the time all I really want to do is hang out at home and nap.

As someone with quite a bit of experience of depression, I feel for you. Depression sucks big time. Sounds like you're on the right track for zapping it though.

Anonymous said...

Perhaps this is not exactly the right place for my comment, but I'm a gonna say it anyway.

I'm a big fan of folks making changes in order to find a way of coping with depression and mood - like eating oats and walking and stuff. Big thumbs up for that. But I'm also a big fan of seeking help if you feel you need a bit more than protein and sunshine.

Something to think about maybe...I'm just throwing that out there :-)

Kitsunegirl said...

Oh yes, let me tell you. When I first went on antidepressants I wanted to get a t-shirt printed up that said "SSRIs Rule, OK"

Plus did I mention the years of psychotherapy. On second thoughts, perhaps I mention it too much.

Hebequeen said...

thanks for your comments. and yes, I gave up years of thepray after leaving the AA book on the doorstep of my ex counsellor. that was 7 years ago...I guess if there wasn't the darkness there wouldnt be the light - or something like that....and a little bit of reassment and struggle with reality is probably a good thing - in the long run....

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